The Gold Standard: Eliza Dushku

Introducing Eliza Dushku, many people know her from the original Bring It On and the New Guy, but thats not why we remember her.  She is an absolute fox.  I remember when I was 12, touching myself to her while she was jumping around in Bring It On.  I am sold that she is one of the only reasons that movie got any hype.  I have to admit that I did forget about her since she hasnt done anything the last few years but if she did, I would pay to see it.  So here is my attempt at rating Eliza Dushku, have we finally found our first dime?

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The Gold Standard: Julianne Hough

Torso= .5

Face= 2.9

Tits= 1.5

Legs= Shes a fuckin dancer, shes got .5 legs.

So we started off  this gold standard segment with the one of the hottest girls in the world.  Look at these pics, honestly how can you argue against it, other than the fact that shes dating fuckin Ryan Seacrest.  Sorry about the lack of ass pics by the way, to make up for it check out her workout video, the bar has been raised.

Ass= 2.7

Overall Rating= 9.1

The Gold Standard

The official Prime Cuts Girl rating system. Learn it.  If you are ever debating whether or not a girl is hot enough to hook up with, just run her through the system, usually for me anyways anything above a 6.5 is worthy. The Prime Cutters are gonna start putting celebrities through the system in search of the Perfect 10, so you best be checkin up on this shit.

Ass= 3 points

Face= 3 points

Tits= 2 points

Legs= 1.5 points

Torso= .5 points

Kanye’s Next Victim: Matt Lauer

Kanye was trying to send Bush an apology years after calling him a racist, but Matt Lauer plays “the taylor swift incident” in the meantime. What will he do next. Call lauer a racist. Interrupt his show with a bottle of hennesy telling him that The View is a better show than USA Today? Or will he come up with something new to make himself an even more hated man.

Following the interview, Kanye tweeted:

“Yo I really wonder if Matt Lauer thought that shit was cool to play the “MTV” clip will I was speaking about Bush?”

Thank You Sugarland for Ruining my Favorite Song

After Sugarland CMA’s performance of Stuck Like Glue, I now have one less song in my itunes library.  The song is great, but Sugarland, figure it the fuck out, everytime you say heart or hair doesnt mean you have to point to a body part. You have a great country voice, but your dancing and hand gestures are pushing me further and further from your music.

Joe Morgan Will Be Missed

No he didnt die. ESPN finally let him go after announcing ball games for over 20 years.  I have to admit, he does have some good insight and I may miss his negative commentary on Sunday Night Baseball, but he has been known to exaggerate at times.

“Jon [Miller], I want to correct something that I said last week — you weren’t here so you weren’t involved — but last week we were talking about Don Wilson pitching a no-hitter and I remember talking to him about Hank Aaron and saying it wouldn’t be the worst thing if he walked him. And he said ‘get away’ and he went out and struck him out. Well it happened in the dugout, not on the field. I got it mixed up with an incident I had with Al Hollins, who in a similar situation was pitching with me at the Giants, so I had the two confused.”

Fifths really?

Fifths suck.  Since we are not 21 yet, we had some d bag that doesnt know how to buy cheap vodka go to the store for us, instead of asking for a handle of Rubinoff like we asked he buys a fifth of vodka.  Seriously why make a Fifth.  Three of us just killed one and we having a hard time feeling a buzz.

This ones for the Critics

We Built this City! How can you not listen to this song and not smile.  Yet USA Today  says that one of the songs my roomates and I pre game to every weekend  is the worst song ever. No. Fuck that. You are not gonna stop me from listening to this song.

Douchbags trying to sound smart

So im in this bullshit online class where we have to talk to our classmate through these forums. What’s been pissing me off is that these douchbags try to use big words and sound so smart, but really your a fuckin retard. Heres a taste what what I have to deal with for the semester.

”I feel that at this point I feel as though Callaway should maintain their premium prices. At this point in time, although it might make sense to lower their price so as to maintain their market, I feel that people feel that Callaway is such a good product because they do have a premium price and therefore it is still viewed as a premium product.”

Like what are you saying, I know you are from Ghana and shit but come on just get to the point.

Now here is how a normal human speaks.  Guess who?

Yeah thats right the fuckin Godfather.

”I agree with your opinion about the industry over the next five years, however, do you think Callaway should continue to keep their prices at a premium, or should they lower them due to the recession and high unemployment levels?”