Lindsay Lohan Shows Up Late to Coroner’s Office For Her Community Service.
So yesterday the lovely Lindsay Lohan got tossed back in jail again for doing something wrong. At this point it doesn’t even matter what the hell she did, if you guess drugs or violated probation you’re probably right. I am so tired of hearing about this bitch it’s ridiculous. I feel like she just gets arrested now to get some publicity even though the only people who still care is TMZ. Regardless of what she might think, Lindsay Lohan is no longer a celebrity. She’s just another bitch who had everything handed to her on a silver platter and pissed it all away. She can’t even show up to her community service at the morgue on time. Grow the fuck up Lindsay, this isn’t The Parent Trap anymore, you can’t just switch places with your secret twin. At least she’ll be with people who look like her at the morgue, that’s probably the only place she’ll be able to get it in anyway. Yeah I did just go there.
At least she’s still killin it in her mugshot
Nothing like this though. She had so much potential as a ginger.
I was having a real hard time deciding who to do for Fuck You Friday today, until I came across this article that Eva Longoria filed for divorce from Tony Parker. Now that part is whatever, but as I’m scanning the article I see that HE FUCKING CHEATED ON HER. Like are you kidding me Tony Parker? You do know that you’re married to the Eva Longoria, right? You know, the goddess of a woman that’s been a spank bank staple for boys and men across the globe for decades? The Desperate Housewife that keeps the show alive with her bangin body and angel face? Jesus Tony figure it the fuck out. I don’t even need to see the chick he was cheating with, which was his teammates wife by the way, to know that Eva is ten thousand times hotter tan her. Like really, it’s Eva fucking Longoria. It’s just a Man Law, if you get a girl MILES out of your league, you lock her up and make sure you keep her, not cheat on her with some married woman. Good Lord I’m speechless. Eva, fuck Mario Lopez, if you need a shoulder to cry on hit me up.